The analogy of the birdcage in DVA has been a critical factor for anyone wishing to explain the unexplainable since. I’m referring to Coercive Control which women just could not explain and also felt they’d be judged by others as these men were often the classic charmers.

Describes how our bodies receive and store information after experiencing abuse and trauma. It recognises that far too often when people have problems, especially mental health problems, they aren’t asked what really happened to them - medicines are given to pacify the patient/client.

Common Couple Violence is when one or both partners use non-controlling aggression in a relationship equally. It can occur at different times or the same time, but neither fears the other partner. This is not a feature of domestic violence, it shows how there can be violence in relationships which is unrelated to abuse.

Children and Family Court, Advisory and Support Service. The CAFCASS social worker is an important social worker that women and men need to access in the right way to receive the right outcome for themselves and their children.

A term coined by Evan Stark to encompass behaviours that were previously too complicated to explain. This involved the undermining of how women were treated which often left women unable to explain what they were going through. He introduced the birdcage analogy which demonstrated how women were like a bird in a cage only no one else could see the bars (the constraints) on the cage.

Coercive Control (CC) is a term coined by Evan Stark to encompass behaviours that were previously too complex to explain. This involved the undermining of how women were treated which often left them exhausted and unable to explain what they were going through. He introduced the birdcage analogy which demonstrated how women were like a bird in a cage only no one else could see the bars (the constraints) on the cage.

DVPO - Domestic Violence Penalty Order given by the Judge in the UK. DVPN - Domestic Violence Penalty Notice given by the police in the UK.

Domestic Violence (DV) and Domestic Abuse (DA) - terms used to describe abusive behaviours in intimate relationships In the UK DA is used as they argue that DV suggests physical violence. My argument is that when the government tells us how to think and what words we can use, they are effectively making us think the way they want us to think. My experience has been that whenever women were free to speak about their abusive relationships, they always used words like, ‘he was a violent man’. Whenever I asked if their partners had been physically abusive, they often said, ‘NO’. People should have the right to self-define otherwise we are altering their choices which is what perpetrators do.

Money/property/gifts given to a bride by her family at the time of marriage. There is much debate over this in various cultures - who gives what to whom and why, what are the reasons behind this?

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy is an interactive psychotherapeutic technique used to relieve psychological stress and trauma.

Behaviour which is seen to uphold virtuous behaviour, in the context of this book, keeping the family’s dignity intact. Usually, women’s roles, men are excused through patriarchy and cultural nuances worldwide (see #38). Number refers to book: Healing From Narcissistic Abuse by Ruby RAJA

When women are killed due to perceived honour of the family being tainted by her actions, often in connection to choosing their own partner or falling in love.

Independent Domestic Violence Advocate whose role is to address the needs of victims at high risk of harm from intimate partners, ex-partners or family members; to secure their safety and the safety of their children.

Domestic violence and abuse by a current or former spouse/partner in an intimate relationship against the other spouse/partner.

Independent Sexual Violence Advisor whose role is to provide specialist tailored services to victims and survivors of sexual violence and abuse.

Independent Domestic Violence Advocate (IDVA) whose role is to address the needs of victims at high risk of harm from intimate partners, ex-partners or family members; to secure their safety and the safety of their children.

Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgendered, Queer Questioning Two-Spirit, Intersex, Asexual and other identities that fall outside the cisgender and heterosexual paradigms.

Multi-Agency Child Exploitation.

Multi-Agency Public Protection Arrangements in Criminal Justice System. This is where multi agency personnel gather to discuss how to protect the public and control the offenders movements and behaviours.

Multi-Agency Risk Assessment Conference for high-risk victims of domestic violence (see #47). Number refers to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse by Ruby Raja. MARACs are for female victims of DVA. Multi agency personnel gather to discuss protection and safety protocol for client.

NPD is mentioned here as it is related to Narcissism and NPD is part of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM) of mental disorders

A person who has delusions of grandeur , it’s all about them. Often used to describe abusers where domestic violence and abuse is the central theme.

UK Government created this agenda supposedly to reduce the threat to the UK from terrorism. Muslim women’s experience of PREVENT was that it was intrusive and disrespectful. Many cases of intrusion into the lives of Muslim women were documented 2007 - 2010. Muslims were targetted specifically.

A protective order used by courts to protect a person usually in cases of domestic violence, sexual abuse, or stalking. Please see resource section of Inshiraa.com

Protection for adults and children; this should protect health and wellbeing as well as the rights of UK citizens. Muslim women felt the invasive and controlling element of Safeguarding which placed them in danger from teachers, social workers, and other professionals who then intervened in their lives unnecessarily through an agenda connected to Prevent.

Legislation recognising Coercive Control as an abusive behaviour with penalties intended to protect victims. See Resource Section of Inshiraa.com. Note that Coercive Control is an offence which requires evidence. Evidence can be anything from texts to emails, to social media postings. Be careful not to dilute evidence.

Sexual violence can relate to any type of abuse related to intimacy. It does not have to be penetrative, it can be suggestive, or a touch. Many sex offenders have not violated another person physically but have violated them through text/phone and other ways.

A set of Islamic principles of law observed by Muslims regarding legal activities, the law; and completely misunderstood in the West. Sometimes used to present Muslims as backward and barbaric when it comes to justice.

Sharm means Shame in South Asian languages. It is often stated alongside honour. A woman's behaviour can be deemed as bringing shame to a family. I argue how can Sharm be bought to a family who has such little value for a girl/woman?

Literal translation is Shame and honour. Please see Sharm as my argument remains.

Youth MARAC is a Multi Agency Risk Assessment Conference for Teens (see #47). This number refers to Healing from Narcissistic Abuse by Ruby RAJA

Youth MARAC - MARAC for Teens (see #47). Number represents book: Healing from Narcissistic Abuse by Ruby RAJA. Youth MARACs exist to protect under 18s from serious domestic violence and abuse.